How To Deal With A Selfish Husband (10 Tips)

selfish husband

Being married means you have a friend by your side through thick and thin. But if you find that your relationship with your husband does not work out as well as you would like, it’s time for the truth to dawn in front of you. You might be dealing with a selfish husband… It is easier to make your decision on leaving him if he cheats on you, but how can you tolerate or deal with personality issues? Here are some signs of a selfish husband and useful tips for dealing with a selfish partner.

5 Sure Signs Of An Inconsiderate Husband

Although every person is selfish at some point in his lifetime, being selfish all the time isn’t normal. A relationship is mutual. It doesn’t work if you have a selfish husband who only takes and never gives back. Here are five sure signs your husband is selfish.

1. Not Interested In Your Interests

Not Interested In Your Interests

A selfish partner would never bother about your dreams, interests, and aspirations in life. He will either not listen or doesn’t pay attention to what you say. The only thing that matters to him is his very own existence. If you have to follow him around for his work by leaving your work behind, then this is a problem.

2. Extremely Dominating

Extremely Dominating

Does your husband behave like he has a right to order you around? Or he doesn’t consider your feelings not even once. You are most probably wasting your time over a selfish person. Your husband is rude and inconsiderate and he is unwilling to compromise for the relationship. Being a narcissist is something else, but an extremely dominating person is unbearable. Such family only hurts you.

3. Doesn’t Say Thank You And Sorry

Doesn’t Say Thank You And Sorry

A selfish husband behaves as if he is always right, so criticism is not for him. He blames everything on you and doesn’t want to reflect on the issues he has with himself. You rarely hear him apologize, say sorry, or thank you. He will be an inconsiderate and self-centred husband and never appreciate your efforts.

4. Never Reaches Out After A Conflict


Some self-centred people have narcissistic tendencies which trigger their desire to always win in arguments. On top of that, if they are as uncaring and inconsiderate as they are selfish, they will never want you to be right. Your uncaring husband will not want to initiate the patch-up.

5. Avoids Communication At All Costs

Avoids Communication

Solid communication is the key to a stronger relationship. Good communication doesn’t mean he has to talk with you for hours and hours. Sometimes, you communicate with unspoken words, and sometimes express thoughts. If you cannot share your worries with your partner, then he’s a selfish husband. 

How To Deal With A Selfish Husband

Indeed, a person cannot entirely change, especially the one who has spent a good amount of his life being a narcissist. But one can always make improvements in dealing with a selfish partner. Here are some useful ways for dealing with a selfish husband.

1. Get To Know Each Other Even Slightly

Know Each Other

When it comes to love, compatibility is key in almost every aspect of our lives. One of the most common ways is by getting to know each other slightly more. While toxic communication breaks people apart, talking on positive terms can get through to him. It is better to discuss naturally than to complain about his behaviors. Always try to convey your thoughts to him well.

2. Be Kind To Him

be kind

When you have a healthy relationship with someone, you expect what you give to the other person. The first step is to show him that you care about him and that you like him. Appreciate the positive things in him. Then, you can talk to him again and see if he’ll try his best to understand and change his attitude towards you.

3. Understand The Root Cause

understand the root cause

Try to get to the root cause of why he is self-centered or selfish. Let him open up to you a little more and listen attentively. When you understand why he behaves rudely, you might be able to better deal with the situation. If he is willing to change himself for the better, then help him change.

Also Read: Understanding each other with empathy connects you and saves your dying relationship from falling apart.

4. Tell Him How You Feel

tell him how you feel

You want to feel loved in return. And of course, he needs to reciprocate the same feeling you feel towards him whenever you communicate with him. Tell him how you truly feel about him. Let him know how he can make you happy. Be there for him when he needs you. That is how you both are going to get out of that toxicity.

5. Stop Doing Everything For Him

stop doing everything

It won’t be easy to break his habit of not doing anything. But if you still kept on doing things to his taste and not giving yourself preference sometimes, it will be fatal. Involve him in some house chores and taking care of kids now and then. You should start making a plan together to get the relationship back on track sooner rather than later.

6. Make Him Realize His Responsibilities

make him realize

Women are built to be more family-oriented and caring. It is in their nature. You might be taking care of all the responsibilities without him realizing it. This makes your selfish husband become more laid back and become hesitant to take on his responsibilities. Therefore, make him realize he has some things to take care of in the family.

7. Set Some Boundaries

set limits

Not arguing all the time is a wise decision on your part. But sometimes you need to speak up for yourself and have to set up some boundaries. To deal with a selfish spouse you have to start with basic things like, respecting each other, acknowledging each other’s dreams and goals, etc. Take turns in house chores if both of you have jobs.

8. Commit To Each Other


It is often said that marriage is hard and that nothing is certain about it. The only thing that is certain about this stage is how close you are to each other and ready to commit. Both partners if they love each other, try to commit to each other and try changing a little bit. Tell him what you think and want from him.

9. Be Selfish For Your Dreams


A selfish person will not only lack emotional connection but, will criticize you constantly. At times like these, you have to make time for yourself as well. If you submit to his liking without saying a word, he will never realize what you sacrificed for him. Your relationship will become mentally abusive. So, speak up for yourself and your ambitions.

10. Break Everything Apart

break up

If you have tried everything and even consult the marriage counseling centers without seeing a change, then your last resort might be breaking apart. This can be the toughest decision you have to make if you love him dearly. But a selfish husband who is unwilling to change will only bring you down in life.

Since every person and every relationship is unique, the above tips to deal with a selfish husband are only some ideas for you to start implying. You should get professional help as well. Just be respectful to each other and know that there is a very long road ahead.

Also Read: If your husband loves your and wants to be a good husband for you, then you should support him to improve himself. 

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