After spending a few years, you identify him as a caring and loving person. However, a thing that genuinely bothers you is his jealousy. Getting jealous is somewhat quite common, but getting over-jealous is undoubtedly madness. When jealousy turns to possessiveness, it is then one starts to hurt his partner, which emotionally drains the other partner. Allowing jealousy in a relationship is a recipe for disaster for your relationship, so you need to handle it very carefully. There are several ways in which you can face this. Following are some helpful tips for your jealous boyfriend or partner.
What Does It Mean by Jealousy in A Relationship?
Jealousy comes from insecurities and resentments, whether towards a person or the people surrounding that person. It is such a feeling that does not help to make long-lasting, loving relationships between partners. In a relationship, when a partner feels insecure about his love and does not trust his better half, he will feel jealous. When we talk about casual relationships, you don’t have to accept jealousy at all. It is because the guy hasn’t invested enough to earn the right from you to get jealous. However, a little jealousy is cute, and it is the right of a long-lasting partner. But getting overly jealous is a leech to the roots of your relationship.
5 Steps for How to Deal with Jealousy in A Relationship
Does your partner get too jealous, and it seems like a problem to your relationship? What do you do? How do you handle this problem to bring back a happy relationship? First, start looking for how to get your jealous partner to overcome jealousy in a relationship.
1. Try to Be Clear in Setting the Rules
Talk to him more clearly about what you want in a relationship and what must be your boundaries towards each other. You can also prepare some ground rules to keep your relationship healthy. It will let you know which button should you never press. Also, try to be open with him. Hiding some information from each other can create some more tensions, which can make him more jealous.
2. Reassure Him Without Giving Things Up
If you stop doing the innocent things you love, only to keep the peace, you will establish a pattern that empowers jealousy and rewards the behavior. So, rather than growing with you as a couple, your partner learns that he can use jealousy every time he feels uncomfortable. He never learns the coping strategies and becomes a pro at using jealousy. Normally, we all have some insecurities. But you are not helping your partner grow through his insecurities by just submitting to them. Instead, help him deal with them by reassuring him.
Also Read: You should try to be more reassuring to your partner if you are in a long-distance relationship.
3. Don’t Try to Love Him Out of It
We hear a lot that true love conquers all. The classic Hollywood story goes about like, once we have love at our backs, we are empowered to chase our dreams and forget all of our fears. This leads to a mindset that if we love our partners enough, it will give them the strength to break through their jealousy and fear. Unfortunately, as pleasant as it sounds, it isn’t true. If you give your partner absolute, undying love and attention every time he gets jealous, he will remain in that bubble forever.
4. Avoid Any Harsh Arguments
In front of the scenes or arguments related to the subject, try not to get into a fierce fight. But if you feel your boyfriend will lose control, analyze the situation with him in a calm manner. Instead of starting arguments, try to solve the problem calmly because your aggressive approach can make the situation worse. Only by communicating with each other calmly can bring yourself to a common ground and find peace.
5. Compliment and Praise Him More
Boosting up his confidence level will help him break out through his insecurities. Try to console him when some things don’t go how he wants, and encourage him to try things out of his comfort zone. Encouragement and hearing compliments from you will make him realize that you care for him, and in such a situation, he might change his behavior.
3 Common Signs to Identify Unhealthy Jealousy in A Relationship
First, you shouldn’t be doing anything unnecessarily suspicious to spark your partner’s jealousy. But, if he does these things all the time, it means he is overly jealous.
1. He Wants to Control You
It often comes as the request not to go somewhere or meet someone he doesn’t want you to. He would ultimately want to take control of your daily life as well and be mad if he doesn’t know some of your schedules. But when you start submitting to those baseless demands, you will make him grow in his jealous feelings even more.
2. He Never Leaves You Alone
One massive jealousy red flag is that he not only wants to be around you, but he does stick like glue. He even refuses to go about his business only to keep an eye on you all day. Most women ignore this sign, but neglecting this sign means burning your whole life yourself. At first, you might feel good that he takes an interest in you. But over time, it leads to a dangerous zone.
Also Read: Many relationships can turn into abusive relationships just because of possessiveness.
3. He Always Has Groundless Suspicions
When he suspects you and everyone around you of having bad intentions, that’s when you should be very alert. That is a big sign of unhealthy jealousy in a relationship. When your partner puts you at fault every time someone tries to approach you or checks your phone sneakily without you knowing, it means he is overly jealous. This is not good if you want to keep a healthy, happy relationship.
Bottom Line – Is Jealousy Healthy in A Relationship?
Jealousy can be toxic to relationships. The problem is if you cater to it whenever it comes up, you will end up having to stop doing the things you love, only to keep the peace. In the long term, jealousy is not a good thing because it will breed resentment and suppress your nature. Trust is vital foundation of a healthy relationship. Develop trust to avoid jealousy in a relationship. But never endure an overpowering, overly possessive partner.